人工: Oh!

人工: I almost forgot!

人工: We will also be participating in the recreational act of exchanging zany theories regarding the culprit behind the glacial-blooded murder of Jaxon’s window panels

Bird: oh boy, zany theories

JAX: i got trigger happy neighbors

JAX: whats the big

Bird: i feel like there wouldve been more shots, or really any sort of progression, if that was the case

JAX: some overzealous knobheads wanted to usurp my throne of badassery

JAX: but the moment their bovine excuse for a weapon penetrated the transparent gate to my turf they unshackled a raging beast of “fuck off im sleeping” thaumaturgy

JAX: my presence permeated throughout the streets of calloway and firmly clenched the malefactors by the balls

JAX: it pulled them close and into their ears it whispered

JAX: “use a real weapon you fucking posers”

JAX: and as their hearts filled with defeat and their pants with piss

JAX: they adopted the daily practice of abstaining from fucking with me

JAX: the whole 9 yards really

Bird: dont u mean 9 millimeters?

JAX: and just like that she steals the show

JAX: my felicitations go out to you haflin

Bird: lmfao, im sorry for encroaching on your cool guy speech