Bird: oh god, u capitalized my name and u used a comma in the same sentence

Bird: what are u up to?

人工: You know, your previous statement regarding the air conditioner...

人工: That was a very smooth segue...

Bird: please, anything but the ellipses

人工: You know...

人工: Segues are a very useful tool in good story writing...

Bird: oh no

Bird: no no no no god no fuck off die die die NIGHTMARENIGHTMARENIGHTMARE

Bird: for fucks sake, i thought i was safe thanks to u getting keyboard scammed

人工: Nothing stands between me and my loyal pupil; this technological trickery is but a petty obstacle.

Bird: please stop using proper syntax, its existentially terrifying

人工: Why would I do that? Writers must present their audience with noticeable eloquence in order to get their attention.

Bird: joey, just because u have a snooty demeanor, and space a single sentence out across 10 messages, doesnt mean ur a good writer or something

人工: But what if there is...

人工: ...a significance?

人工: To me conversing in such strange cadences?

人工: If a detail has prominence, then it must have a purpose.

人工: Besides creating DrAmA

人工: My way of texting will surely have a meaning in the future.

人工: Whether I know what that meaning is at the moment or not.

Bird: i think ur just really good at bullshitting and disguising it as avant-garde story writing

人工: Well, guess what

人工: That just so happens to be the topic of today’s writing lesson with Joey.

Bird: no, shut up, there is no topic, there is no lesson

Bird: there is only me who doesnt give a shit and u who will now leave me alone

人工: Be honest with me Reya, do I sound like I know what I'm talking about?

Bird: no

人工: No, yes I do

人工: Of course I do! I do all the time!

人工: But the truth is: I actually don't

Bird: i know that

Bird: got tired of using periods?

人工: (its hard living up to expectations so id rather not spawn any)

人工: As I was saying

人工: When you view quotidian occurrences as plot points, you start seeing your life as a story, and the many ways you can manipulate it

人工: You learn to retcon the meaning of a seemingly mundane detail

人工: To then catch your readers by surprise, and BLOW THEIR MINDS!

人工: AND SO WHAT IF I'M BULLSHITTING?

人工: If I can masterfully make you think that I planned it all along, I WIN!

人工: Which is why, once again

人工: In today’s lesson of Learning Storywriting With Joey, I will teach you how to effectively utilize one of the most nifty elements of a powerful story...

人工: ...and that is... a flashback...

Bird: ...

Bird: a flashback? really?